Okay...so I found this picture of when we were on our honeymoon.....and I thought it was a great picture of what I am feeling lately. So this is suppose to be my nervous/scared/excited face. So confession number one: I don't particularly like the unknown. So the whole idea of giving birth just scares me right now. I am starting to doubt myself and if I can really do it. I mean, I know I have no choice...this baby is coming, ready or not, but I would really like a sneak preview before it all happens at once. What makes it worse...is Francisco is fretting about it. He hates to see anyone in pain. For one, he always says, "Maggie what are you going to do?" Hmmmmm....not quite sure, but I was hoping he had some idea...guess not. Then the other night, he says that maybe we should think of asking my mom to come as a back up just in case he would pass out because this stuff makes him a little uneasy. Oh great! So now I am worrying about him, whether he will stay on his own two feet or not. My sister says what she wouldn't give to be a fly on the wall during my labor. Now, I am starting to think this is going to be interesting. Sometimes I lay awake at night visualizing the whole process and thinking of a way out. Funny. There is no way out. I even start thinking about Eve and how in the world did she do it...she was the first woman to give birth to a child and without medicine, a doctor, etc. Wow! Now that is a superwoman. So if she did it, why can't I? And she did it more than once. Now, it must not be that bad. Anyway, this is a tiny glimpse of what is going on inside my head the majority of the day.
Oh yeah, I have to add the piece about how I just love the fact (not really) that when you don't even ask for people's personal experience they tell you their horror story anyway. Then after all is said and done, they say, "you'll be just fine" oh yeah right thanks....what makes my situation so different. Errrr. Well, my comfort lies in knowing I have the strength of the Lord. There is a little corner in my heart filled with excitement to share this experience with my husband...although it will be painful I think it will be a bonding experience. And what comes in the end is a blessing from the Lord...a baby that he has entrusted us with, to care for and to grow in his ways.
8 comments:
Meghan honey- please call me! I can ease your fears. I have done it, and you can too!! I think you're gonna do great. But please call me. We can talk it through!
shadley
Shadley- I would love to call you, but I don't have your number! Can I call you during labor too? :)
meg- you'll do great- i bet it'll be easy for you- you're right it's gotta come out- and the sweet thing is they won't let you go for weeks in labor- so it'll happen.. and sweet joy and you'll forget what it felt like after a few days or weeks maybe! :) ya know you can go in trying to do it without meds-- but if it hurts then just get meds- oh the joys of an epidural loved them!!!!! it's really not that bad meg trust me- well i didn't have the twins naturally and simeon was really small- but even the contractions weren't that bad (or maybe i'm forgetting :)
the Lord's grace girl!!!
love ya
jamie is right!! not bad and then sweet joy!!!!!
oh, meghan, just email me at shadley@mediamesa.com and i will give you my #. i get weirded out about putting my ph# on these websites!
call me during labor, delivery, the whole 9!
You guys are sweet. You make me feel a "little" better. Can't lie..still a little scared. You know what else...I am nervous that I won't know I am actually in labor. Love ya gals. Thanks
meg you'll know you're in labor- it's very few people who actually don't know their water broke- but you'll know it breaks trust me- it's like you peed your pants times 100 (at least for me it was) and then your contractions will feel like PMS cramps- when i wasn't sure this time with the twins i just started looking at the clock- when they are coming like every 10 mins and then fading those are contractions even if they don't hurt that bad- but they will start hurting more as time gets closer.
love ya
but don't count on your water breaking, mine never did...it was just steady painful cramping...go to the hospital a million times if you want, they don't care if they have to send you home!
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